Being part of a romantic relationship is the us vs them aspect, the Oxytocinic influence of keeping a secret. Feeling able to do anything you want with the person around your arms and no one else.
Trance at that youthful time encompassed romance, secrecy, loyalty, a thick sense of camaraderie. Knowing something that no one else knew outside these four walls. A sense of purpose a sense of understanding, a sense of pure acceptance.
Growth feels uncomfortable. But what does it mean when you just feel pain?
30 days of sickness with another ten days of medicine.
What does forty years of contemplating about having a disease inside you feel like? Not very good, I can tell you.
Sometimes I think I really should try to see the end of what this story is. Just to sit there dumbfounded, disabused at the moment, and watch it all unfurl. Like a wicked tapestry to deceive the kindest of souls. What do you do when the mind is your jail?
Sometimes I think my love of trance is just an unhealthy attachment to that moment. Living free in the forgotten space of a broken down warehouse, there was no judgement, just love. A ceo who brought in a keg of beer surrounded by loyal admirers to his island of brew, on the other side, a pool boy who had managed to salvage lights from a mansion on Biscayne blvd emitting a beautiful ghostly hue of blue around his neck. All of us moving slowly, through each beat enveloped in a loving synchronicity, all speaking the transcendent sound of four on the floor.
A person with glowsticks, creating wheels and angel wings around those he cared about, and of course, the chill out room. The most relaxed area in the house. People who had just been through life times, encompassed in a few moments. You go in with your problems and they coach you through each life time. Once you understand the arrangement, you aren’t free to go, but free to help the person that just walked in. Passing down the karmick baton, the line of understanding and refuge was never broken. Bodichitta bodichitta bodichitta.
I was told that the world needs more love. I’m not sure that’s accurate. People need more love, animals need more love, trees need more love. The world… doesn’t make any sense to me, it seems like it just needs to end.
Does love mean you will listen to the word vomit someone expels?
Crunchy Kodamas 